A Year Later
Plant baby bringing joy in a beautiful pot!
Hello Dear Friends:
I hope you all continue to be well. Since my last post, we have had wonderful winter weather here in Michigan. And I say "wonderful" because I love cold, sunny days with lots of snow on the ground. If it's January or February, I much prefer these conditions to moderately cold, gray days. The sunshine energizes me. And when it's a gray day, I try to keep perspective and a positive attitude. Keeping a positive attitude doesn't come easily or naturally to me. I have to work at it. And when I do, which is almost every day, everything is better.
These can be hard times to keep a positive mindset, with many wrongs in the world and great suffering happening everywhere. At the same time, by taking care of ourselves, we are in a better position to right wrongs and to alleviate suffering. We can start with ourselves and work our way outward. My focus over the last year has narrowly been on taking care of myself and my immediate family. It's been a good thing. This last year of relative isolation has been tranformational for me. I have learned so many lessons, some of them unpleasant, and grown as a human. Personal growth is a core value of my life and my writing here.
Below, I share two areas that have helped me transform in the past year: letting go and missing out. I hope my words touch your heart and make you think about how you too have changed in the last year.
Letting Go:
Let me tell you a little story....For years, we had this half dead jade plant that lived in front of a basement window in our home. I had moved it there because I didn't like looking at it every day on the main floor. The plant was alive, but it was lopsided and ugly, thanks to an extended family member pruning it (without asking) years prior. I just felt bad whenever I looked at that plant. About a year ago, one of the green branches broke off, which allowed me to see the obvious solution. I popped the fallen branch into some water and ordered potting supplies. Last February (2020) beautiful white ceramic pots arrived in a box on my doorstep. I proceeded to cut off all of the live branches from that ugly plant in order to repot my "plant babies". What was left of the old plant and soil I dumped in our backyard compost. It felt so good to let go of that plant (and the resentment toward the person who hacked it up). Over the last year, my plant babies have thrived in their new pots, bringing me joy every day.
That jade plant is a bit of an analogy for what I have experienced over the last year. Yes, some days I feel tired by the limitations on my life right now. And yet, stripping away all of the unneccessary distractions allowed me to go inward to heal my soul on a deeper level. Taking away external expectations that I had tried so hard and so unhappily to live up to, I am able to find my true happiness. A lot of us are disturbed during this time because the stillness has brought up shadow issues. And if we are brave enough, we can see this time of quiet as an opportunity, one we never hope to have in quite the same way again. I am taking this opportunity to feel the joy in letting go of all that no longer serves me.
JOMO:
Have you heard this term "JOMO" before? It's Joy of Missing Out, instead of FOMO: Fear of Missing Out. However, these days there isn't much to miss out on. This is a pandemic silver lining for folks like me, who too often say "yes" when our heart screams "no" (a phrase I learned from Courtney Carver). The past year has been a welcome respite for me. It feels a bit ridiculous that it would take a pandemic for me to say "no, thank you" to external expectations that put me out of alignment. Nonetheless, I am grateful for this chance. This time has given me deep healing. When the world opens up again, I hope I have the confidence and the skills to gracefully say "no, thank you". That "no" will allow me to say "yes, please" with a new appreciation to more meaningful things.
I am curious how this time has changed you? Please, do share!
All my best,
Carolyn
